Narcissus Boy
by Liberty Ford
Summary: Hermione thinks about Draco and she fights with her true feelings. Short piece with a little twist at the end... Hermione/Draco pairing!


Disclaimer: All characters are Joanne Rowling's, not mine…
    
    **_Narcissus Boy_**

            I walk down the corridor and you pass me. I find myself looking at your face. Maybe I'm searching for some kind of human expression; well if I am I'm out of luck. Your face is always in a sneer. I'd even describe you as a young Snape and that's saying something. 
    
    **_Dear momma's boy I know you've had your butt licked by your mother_**
    
    **_I know you've enjoyed all that attention from her_**
    
    **_And every woman graced with your presence after_**
    
    **_Dear narcissus boy I know you've never really apologized for anything_**
    
    **_I know you've never really taken responsibility_**
    
    **_I know you've never really listened to a woman_**

            Remember that time I slapped you? I was even shocked at my response. You call me a mudblood… you have no idea how much that hurts me. Every word you speak to me, I think it's an attempt to make me angry. It often succeeds. 
    
    **_Dear me-show boy I know you're not really into conflict resolution_**
    
    **_Or seeing both sides of every equation_**
    
    **_Or having an uninterrupted conversation_**

I'd love to just scratch your eyes out slowly and painfully. Think yourself lucky that's just not me. I'm too proper for that. I'm working hard to make prefect or maybe if I'm lucky head girl. I really shouldn't make time to think about you at all.
    
    **_And any talk of healthiness_**
    
    **_And any talk of connectedness_**
    
    **_And any talk of resolving this_**
    
    **_Leaves you running for the door              _**
    
    **_Why why do I try to love you?_**
    
    **_Try to love you when you really don't want me too_**

            It doesn't seem to matter how much my friends hate you. I can't seem to hate you enough. They believe you're evil, a young deatheater, a young Snape. I know Snape's good now. Are you? He's helping our side. Are you?
    
    **_Dear egotist boy you've never really had to suffer any consequence_**
    
    **_You've never stayed with anyone longer than ten minutes_**
    
    **_You'd never understand anyone showing resistance_**
    
    **_Dear popular boy I know you're used to getting everything so easily_**
    
    **_A stranger to the concept of reciprocity_**

**_People honour boys like you in this society_**

            I know you're spoilt by your mother, I know your father wants you exactly like him. Please, before you go off into something you don't understand, sit down and think about it. Do you want to die a young and horrible death? Most deatheaters die you know.
    
    **_And any talk of selflessness_**
    
    **_And any talk of working at this_**
    
    **_And any talk of being of service_**
    
    **_Leaves you running for the door            _**
    
    **_Why why do I try to help you try to help you_**
    
    **_When you really don't want me to_**

What about 'He who must not be named'? How can you face him? He's not forgiving and he's not like us. We'll understand if you're sorry about what you do. I will understand why you do what you do. Don't grow up like your father.
    
    **_You go back to the women who will dance the dance_**
    
    **_You go back to your friends who will lick your ass_**
    
    **_You go back to ignoring all the rest of us_**

**_You go back to the centre of your universe_**

Do you still have to hurt me? Even when i feel like I feel, do you still have to say those nasty things? My blood is not dirty. My blood is as pure as the next witches or wizards. My grades are higher than yours, yet you say I'm not a pure witch. I don't understand the way you act. I just know it's you.
    
    **_Dear self-centred boy I don't know why I still feel affected by you_**
    
    **_I've never lasted very long with someone like you_**
    
    **_I never did although I have to admit I wanted to_**
    
    **_Dear magnetic boy you've never been with anyone who doesn't take your shit_**
    
    **_You've never been with anyone who's dared to call you on it_**
    
    **_I wonder how you'd be if someone were to call you on it_**

            I want to tell you how I feel. I understand it no more than you will but I love you. After it all I still love you. When I get this feeling and I've had it for over two years now, words cut so deep. I could reply back but I'd rather just ignore it than bite. I'm accepting that you'll probably never change. That you'll probably never love me quite like I love you. In fact you'll probably never love me at all.
    
    **_And any talk of willingness_**
    
    **_And any talk of both feet in_**
    
    **_And any talk of commitment              _**
    
    **_Leaves you running for the door                       _**
    
    **_Why why do I try to change you?_**
    
    **_Try to change you when you really don't want me too_**
    
    ****
    
                   Draco Malfoy walked down the hallway and passed the Granger girl. 
    
    _Harry's friend…_ He thought to himself. "Oh look it's the mudblood!" he shouted loudly.
    
    He watched as a small tear formed in her eye but she continued to walk anyway. 
    
    _Damn…_ he said to himself. 
    
    _If only I could stop it…_
    
    _If only I could be nice to her…_
    
    _If only she was acceptable in my father's house…_
    
    _If only… if only she actually liked me…_
    
    ****
    
    **_You go back to the women who will dance the dance_**
    
    **_You go back to your friends who will lick your ass_**
    
    **_You go back to being so oblivious_**
    
    **_You go back to the centre of the universe_**


End file.
